Whatwomen really want....

Young King Arthur was ambushed andimprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch couldhave killed him, but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So themonarch offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficultquestion. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if, after ayear, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question: What do women really want?

Such a question would perplex even themost knowledgeable man, and, to young Arthur, it seemed an impossiblequery. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch'sproposition to have an answer by year's end. 

He returned to his kingdom and beganto poll everybody: the princess, the prostitutes, the priests, the wisemen, the court jester.  He spoke with everyone, but no one couldgive him a satisfactory answer.  Many people advised him to consultthe old witch--only she would know the answer. 

The price would be high; the witch wasfamous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no alternative but totalk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he'd have toaccept her price first: The old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the mostnoble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified: She was hunchbacked and hideous, had onlyone tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises ... etc. He hadnever encountered such a repugnant creature. He refused to force hisfriend to marry her and have to endure such a burden.

Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He told himthat nothing was too big a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservationof the Round Table. Hence, their wedding was proclaimed, and the witchanswered Arthur's question thus:

What a woman really wants is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth andthat Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was. The neighboringmonarch granted Arthur total freedom.

What a wedding Gawain and the witch had! Arthur was torn between reliefand anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display, and generally madeeveryone very uncomfortable.

The honeymoon hour approached. Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific experience,entered the bedroom. But what a sight awaited him! The most beautifulwoman he'd ever seen lay before him! The astounded Gawain asked what hadhappened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her whenshe'd appeared as a witch, she would henceforth be her horrible,deformed self half the time, and the other half, she would be herbeautiful maiden self. Which would he want her to be during the day, andwhich during the night? 

What a cruel question! Gawain ponderedhis predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to hisfriends, but at night, in the privacy of his home, an old witch? Orwould he prefer having by day a hideous witch, but by night a beautifulwoman with whom to enjoy many intimate moments?

Noble Gawain replied that he would let her choose for herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all thetime, because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of herown life.

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