神马文学网2010最好笑的笑话，你准备好了吗？-英语文章阅读-view-大耳朵英语 - 免费在线英语...
来源：百度文库 编辑：神马文学网 时间：2024/04/27 03:22:39
I was having a drink at a local restaurant with my friend Justin when he spotted an attractive woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering his courage, he approached her and asked, "Would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"
我和朋友贾斯丁在一个饭店喝酒。贾斯丁看到了一位非常漂亮的女士，几经犹豫之后他终于鼓起勇气，走到她面前问道：“你介意我和你聊会儿天吗？”
She responded by yelling at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't come over to your place tonight!"
那位女士很大声的回答说：“不，我今天晚上不会去你家的！”
With everyone in the restaurant staring, Justin crept back to our table, puzzled and humiliated. A few minutes later, the woman walked over to us and apologized.
这时餐馆里的每个人都盯着贾斯丁，他默默的回到我们的桌子，觉得很困惑也有种被羞辱的感觉。几分钟过后，那位女士向我们走过来并道歉道：
"I'm sorry if I embarrassed you," she said, "but I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying human reaction to embarrassing situations."
”如果让i你觉得尴尬我很抱歉“”我是心理学的研究生，我研究的是人在遭遇尴尬事的反应.“
At the top of his lungs Justin responded, "What do you mean, two hundred dollars?"
贾斯汀大声回答说：“你什么意思，要200美元吗？”
2. Duck in a Bar酒吧里的鸭子
This duck walks into a bar, and asks the bartender, “Do you have any grapes"?
有只鸭子走进一间酒吧，问酒保：“你们这儿有葡萄吗？”
The bartender says, "No we only sell beer here". The duck leaves.
酒保说:"没有，我们只卖啤酒。“鸭子就走了。
The next day the duck walks back into the bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any grapes"?
第二天，，鸭子又去了那家酒吧问酒保：”你们这儿有葡萄吗？“
The bartender says, "No I told you we only sell beer, and if you ask me again I'm going to nail your beak to the bar.” So the duck leaves.
酒保说：”没有，我跟你说过我们这只卖啤酒，如果你再来问，我就用钉子把你的嘴钉到吧台上。“鸭子又走 了。
The next day the duck walks back into the bar, and asks the bartender “Do you have any nails"? The bartender says "no".
第三天，鸭子又去了酒吧问酒保，”你们这有钉子吗？“酒保说，”没有“
The duck asks "Do you have any grapes"?
鸭子又问，”你们这有葡萄吗？“
3.Climate Change气候变化
According to a news story, if global warming continues, in 20 years the only chance we'll have to see a polar bear is in a zoo. So in other words, nothing is going to change.
据新闻报道，如果全球变暖继续恶化，二十年后我们唯一能看到北极熊的地方就是动物园了。换句话说，没什么改变。
4.Numbing麻醉
At the busy dental office where I work, one patient was always late. Once when I called to confirm an appointment, he said, "I'll be about 15 minutes late. That won't be a problem, will it?"
在我工作牙科很忙，但有一位病人总是迟到。有一次，我打电话跟他确认见面时间，他说，”我可能会迟到15分钟，那不会有什么关系吧？“
"No," I told him. "We just won't have time to give you an anesthetic."
”不会",我告诉他。“只是那样的话，我们就没时间给你打麻醉了。”
He arrived early.
他提前到了。
5. Misunderstood误解
Hard to believe, but many of our customers at the bank still don't know how to swipe their card through the ATM card reader. Because of this, my fellow tellers and I often find ourselves having to explain how it's done. One teller complained that she kept getting odd looks every time she explained it. I found out why when I overheard her tell one man, "Strip down facing me."
很难相信，我们的很多顾客，仍然不知道怎么在银行的自动取款机上刷卡。就因为这样，我的同事和我常常得为他们解释。一位出纳抱怨到，她总是看到顾客脸上露出奇怪的表情当她解释的时候。我终于找到了原因，是我无意中听到她告诉一位男士，“面对我向下刷卡”。